


Overworked, Unedited and Unfinished

by Flygon_Master



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Superheroes/Superpowers, Amputee Peridot (Steven Universe), Angst, Corruption, F/F, Fluff, NSFW Chapters, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pervert Lapis, Roommates, Science Fiction, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Soulmates, Vampires, Werewolves, oblivious peridot, story ideas, unedited story, unfinished story
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-22
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-23 20:11:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 16,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20346025
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flygon_Master/pseuds/Flygon_Master
Summary: This will be a collection of One-Shots primarily, although Two-Shots and Drabbles are not unreasonable. I was getting tired of always trashing everything I wrote due to either overworking it to the point of it being a bloated mess or losing my muse and letting my interest for any given concept gradually fade until I can't bring myself to work on it any more. So I decided I would simply post all of it for those with too much free time on their hands to peruse at their digression. I won't say everything here is dead forever as I often revitalize ideas that I have previously cast aside, but for the time being if it's here don't expect much to come from it.(Description, Tags, Chapter Names and Chapters are subject to changes based on my whims.)





	1. Ideas and Concepts

**Author's Note:**

> This first Chapter is a list of story Ideas and Concepts I have had floating around in my head for varying lengths of time and have finally decided to plot them out on theoretical paper in hopes to either clear them from my brain or inspire me to work on them.
> 
> As you will see from the following ideas and then subsequent chapters I seem to identify the most with Peridot and find her the easiest to write. However, that does not mean I am opposed to other characters or relationships that do not involve her. If I get struck by a good Rupphire or Bismethyst idea or concept I will make sure to add it to the list right away, I just get easily influenced by Peridot's unique traits for the most part.
> 
> Also feel free to utilize anything you see in this chapter or any of the following ones. If I can inspire anyone with the mess that is this FanFiction then I'll consider it a win.

**(Peridot x Lapis)**

**\--- Pirates AU \---**

**SFW / [NSFW?]**

  * A Fantasy AU set in a Pirates of the Caribbean esque world.

  * At the time the story begins there are seven Pirate Lords:

\- Steven Universe | The Pink Diamond and ruler of the North Pacific   
\- Lapis Lazuli | The Tidal Queen and ruler of North Atlantic  
\- Yvette Diamont | The Yellow Diamond and ruler of the South Pacific  
\- Brielle Diamont | The Blue Diamond and ruler of the South Atlantic  
\- Winn Diamont | The White Diamond and ruler of the Indian Ocean  
\- Aqua Marina | The Frigid Queen and ruler of the Arctic  
\- Lars Barriga | The Returned and ruler of the South China Sea  


  * All of the Pirate Lords are in some form mystical, pushing them above the rest of the world’s navel captains. For example: Lapis would be *shocker* half siren while Lars would be *shocker x2* a normal sailor who gained supernatural abilities after he was exposed to the land of the dead.

  * Each Pirate Lord has their own Magical Trinket or Gem, similar to the Pieces of Eight, that shows their status as a Lord while also granting them some form of power or an enhancement to a power they already poses. For example: Lapis has a jeweled cape that enhanced her own innate ability to manipulate water, while Yvette has a short spear she can use to summon lightning.

  * There are rumors as old as the seas themselves that an island teeming with treasure and magic lurks in ever drifting cursed waters. There has been many attempts to reach the island, all of which have ended in failure…except for one. Rumor has it that one of the many ships sent into the cursed waters by Yvette survived and made it to the island, but never returned to their Lord with the spoils.

  * Peridot was a navigator aboard that ship and when they ran afoul an ancient eldritch monster most of the crew, greedy and cruel and much to Yvette’s liking, suffered a terrible fate by its hands. Peridot however proved herself to the creature and was blessed with ancient understandings that no mortal had learned before. It nearly drove her mad and if it wasn’t for the few remaining crew and the mysterious inhabitants of the island she would have been lost to insanity.

  * The story would start when Lapis and Steven, in an effort to discuss their plans to find the island away from the prying eyes of the Diamont’s, stumble upon the cursed captain of the Jade Hand and her crew in a remote tavern far outside of any normal piracy route. After having survived the monster and the trip through the cursed waters thanks to Peridot’s guidance the remaining crew dubbed her their captain and pledged their life to her.

  * The first part of the story would revolve around the group’s attempts to convince Peridot and her crew to lead an expedition back to the island. Much of the beginning would focus on Peridot’s drunk and belligerent ways, as she drowns herself in alcohol to tune out the ancient whispers ever present in her mind. However, the rest of the cast aside from Peridot’s crew wouldn’t know this and just take her for a washed up drunk. Many believing the tale of her success to be false after seeing her drunken ways.

  * The rest of the tale would involve the trip, the adventures and eventual love that would form between the different Lords and their crew as they would all end up taking Lapis’ ship due to it being the fastest and most efficiently built for such a trip. Well, all the Lords except for the Diamont’s not sure if I would want to fit them in to be honest I think just about every other Gem would be plenty.

  * Most of the characters would have a Gem obviously, but the Lord’s Gems are the most powerful.

  * Peridot’s Gem is a jade diadem that allows her to control things via magnetism and enhances some of the eldritch powers she obtained through her trial with the monster.

  * Not much more I can really say right now on this one. It would be several chapters long, 20+ at about 5,000 words a chapter I would assume knowing me, if I ever get around to writing it. I really want badass drunken pirate Peridot and every time a Lapidot anniversary or something rolls around and I read stories about mermaids and pirates I always get the itch to write it out so maybe someday I will.

**(Lapis x Peridot) (Pearl x Peridot) (Pearl x Lapis) (Pearl x Lapis x Peridot)**

**\--- Superhero AU \--- **

**SFW**

  * A Superhero AU set in a Spiderman esque world.

  * The Crystal Gems are a super hero group similar to the Avengers or the Justice League based in Beach City, but do try to make their presence worldwide with smaller detachments such as the Off Colors traveling wherever they are needed.

  * Their main adversary is the large corporate entity known to most simply as Homeworld. An upstanding business conglomerate to the public eye, but a vile and corrupt breeding ground for some of the worst villainy imaginable. Think of Oscorp from the Spiderman universe, creating (sometimes the villains themselves) and selling all manner of weapon and drug to anyone with enough money.

  * Peridot is a high ranking scientist and is tasked with studying, learning about and eventually dissecting and recreating and alien symbiote. However, Peridot finds herself bonding with it and lovingly dubs it her little Pumpkin.

  * After an attempt to kill her and the symbiote leaves Peridot scarred and on the brink of death she allows Pumpkin to bond to her. The act revitalizes her and the symbiote, but causes her to become more irritable and spastic as she is unused to having so much power while the symbiote is unused to bonding to a considerably weaker lifeform.

  * The story would mainly focus on Peridot being an anti-hero at first. Sometimes fighting the Crystal Gems, sometimes helping them fight Homeworld or an equally nasty villain. Eventually she would come around and join the group.

  * The only other idea I had besides Pumpkin being the symbiote, making Peri a small orange venom like monster when fully armored, was that at some point in the story Pumpkin would need to bond with either Pearl or Lapis for some reason and effectively out Peridot for her twin crushes, probably leading to her joining the group.

  * Also yes it would be Pearlapidot or as I like to call it: Liquid-Spearmint! Why? Well why not! Besides for some reason when the idea floats across my brain that’s just how I envision it.

**(Pearl x Peridot) (Garnet x Peridot) (Sapphire x Ruby x Peridot)**

**\--- Age-Play \---**

**SFW / [NSFW?]**

  * The rowdier bunch of gems get together to play Truth or Dare while Steven is away on a three day weekend trip.

  * At some point during the game Amethyst dares Peridot to refer to Pearl as “Mommy” for the duration of Steven’s trip. Not long after the dare has been issued does Pearl return from a solo mission and things simply progress from there.

  * Not sure if it would ever reach NSFW territory as all I had ever commit to thought was the image of Pearl, Garnet and Sapphire feeding Peridot out of a baby bottle and carrying her around while they do other things like cooking or cleaning, but who knows? Maybe it would get kinky if I ever got around to actually trying to write it.

**(Bismuth x Peridot)**

**\--- Fantasy AU \---**

**SFW**

  * I once read a FanFiction where Peridot was a Dragon Rider and Bismuth sexed her up in the shower and my mind played with that idea for a quite a while. (Saddle Sore or something I believe, if you look for Bismuth/Peridot stories it shouldn’t be too hard to find. It’s a good read from what I remember.)

  * Some of my ideas featured Peridot as a Dragon Rider like in the inspiration story, while others had Peridot being the dragon herself. Sometimes full blooded, sometimes as a half-ling.

  * Not much else to say as most of my ideas for where I wanted a story like that to go have left me now, but I do like the pairing and setting so never say never I guess.

**(Pairings Undecided If Any)**

**\--- TRON / CyberPunk AU \---**

**SFW**

  * A Cyberpunk Fantasy AU with a lot of inspiration drawn from TRON.

  * The main idea focuses on GemTekk, a multitrillion dollar computer conglomerate, and its four sister CEOs. After spending billions of dollars in secretly constructing their own private super computer / server farm, GemTekk released to the public their own alternative to the World Wide Web. Newer, faster and most importantly exclusive to them and costly to use. GemTekk nearly tripled its net worth in just the first hour of going live to the world as everyone from millionaires to governments wanted to jump on this almost exclusive new online frontier.

  * However, GemTekk had a dark secret. In order to keep an interconnected system like theirs running smoothly and without error on such a large scale they needed a veritable army of workers watching over it constantly. Human error, corporate espionage and a whole laundry list of other negatives came along with that veritable army of people they would need to hire…so the CEOs circumvented the entire ordeal by coming up with what they saw as the perfect solution.

  * They would simply digitized their entire workforce into G.E.M.s. Transferring the living consciousness of a human being into their system and converting it to a software program stopped almost every problem they had before they could have them. No need for breaks or payments, no need to worry about a lesser worker being bribed by a competitor and best of all no free will on their G.E.M.s part.

  * When the CEOs handed down an order it was followed through without fail, just as the G.E.M.s were made to do.

  * Everything was looking up for GemTekk and its CEOs until one of the sisters secretaries spoke out of line and was carted off to be digitized. The sister, who happened to be the youngest and least respected of the four, watched in horror before flying into a fit of rage. The gravity of the companies actions hitting her full force and she ignored her sister’s pleas for rationality as she told them she was going to oust them to the public for what they had been doing, for how many lives they had taken.

  * With no other course of action the other three CEOs solemnly gave the command for their sister to be digitized alongside her secretary.

  * It was a mistake they would come to regret as their youngest sister had programmed a contingency in case they ever turned on her and she entered the system with full autonomy. Swiftly freeing many of the other ‘programs’ to aid her in taking down the system from the inside.

  * At some point during her crusade the younger sister would find a way to revert the digitizing process return to the outside world. However, they discovered that it was unsafe for most of the G.E.M.s to attempt the reversion process as many of the workers minds had been fractured in order to make multiple programs instead of just one.

  * With reluctance the younger sister leaves the system, being in control of her full self unlike the others, with the intention of helping them from the outside. Sadly her body had been forever altered by the digitization and found that she couldn’t return to the GemTekk offices without alerting her sisters, nor could she reenter the system without the chance of further corrupting herself as she was now a living digital construct instead of flesh and bone.

  * The story would begin with Rose reluctantly sending her son Steven into the system to help finish the war she had started all those years ago. Due to Steven’s unique nature of being half human and half digital he can come and go from the system as he pleases and has much more control of the system then even his mother did.

  * Even with her reluctance Rose hopes Steven can do what she could not and save the trapped G.E.M.s. With the help of Rose’s closest friend’s…

  * Pearl | GUI Editor
  * Garnet | Malware Hunter / Virus Prevention Amalgamation
  * Amethyst | User Security
  * Bismuth | Software Development

  * …and even some new ones…

  * Lapis Lazuli | Task Manager
  * Peridot | Mainframe Analyzer and G.E.M.s Editor
  * Nephrite | Deletion and Debugging

  * …Steven might just have a shot at bringing down the whole corrupt system!

  * This one would be another rather long 20+ chapter endeavor filled with light cycle fights and laser sword battles and a lot of techno babble! I have a lot of half-baked ideas that I don’t want to type out here right now that are super cool in my mind’s eye. Plus it would be the first time I have ever dabbled in a cyberpunk setting so that would be fun.

**(Connie x Peridot)**

**\--- Canonverse \---**

**NSFW**

  * An idea I had where an older Connie and Steven have been dating for quite some time, but after browsing a few online threads wonder if there is more to either of their sexuality then they both had thought.

  * They both decide to spend a romantic and love filled evening with someone of the same gender to try and get to know not only themselves, but a close friend better.

  * After thinking about it all week Connie decides that Peridot would be the best choice to have her little experiment with and comes to find out that she is more attracted to Gems them she initially realized.

  * I have no idea what kind of sequels could be born from or for that matter what would even feature in a story like this, could be anything really as I imagine older Connie to be super kinky and Peridot is as bottom as bottoms come. All I know is that the fact that there is no Connie x Peridot stories is an absolute crime.

**(Peridot x Crystal Gems)**

**\--- Canonverse \---**

**SFW / NSFW**

  * I want (and when I say “want” I mean this is the most likely idea to get written out) to write a multi-chapter story of loosely related, yet in the same universe, one-shots of Peridot paired with every number of possible Gem pairings…

  * No real ideas or plans on that front, just whatever pair and situation happens to come to mind really…

  * I WANT A PERIDOT HAREM DAMNIT!


	2. Oblivious - Lapidot - (SFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is categorized under: Overworked.

It was a sunny day in the month of August when Peridot Yseult Adler Diamond was born into the family of wealthy business tycoon Yvette Diamond.

Yvette Diamond was fury filled whirlwind on the tech industry, quickly rising through the ranks in multiple tech firms before eventually fashioning her own company to take the world by storm. A masterful strategist and clever business woman Yvette had everything in her life planned to the hilt, but nowhere in her plans had she accounted for the sudden realization that she had gotten pregnant.

Peridot could not have come into the world at a worse time as far as Yvette was concerned. Either she would have to delegate the child’s upbringing to another or she would have to risk everything she had built, all the deals she was in the middle of signing, all the influence she had gained…her choice hadn’t been easy, but in the end she chose to leave her daughters care up to someone else.

Not that Yvette wouldn’t have any say in the matter, she could afford the most skilled nannies and housekeepers after all, she just wouldn’t be there personally when the child needed someone is all.

It’s not like the child _needed_ her specifically, as long as someone was there to feed her and clean her messes then it was fine. Once Peridot was older and Yvette’s company was more stable than the woman could devote a little more time to her offspring…

Peridot never knew the warmth of her mother’s arms growing up, never got to see Yvette smile at her when she did something cute or learned something new…no one even knew what her first word had been or when she took her first steps…

The small girl was completely oblivious to the fact that she was even missing out of these experiences…

Aside from the lack of love and affection from her parental figure, the first few years of Peridot’s life wasn’t all that different from any other child born in her generation. The nannies and housekeeping staff made sure she had as normal an early childhood as she could, making sure to read and play learning games with her to help her grow both physically and mentally.

As Peridot got older it became increasingly obvious that she would be quite a bit smaller than the average child her age and while she wasn’t sickly by any means, she wasn’t a very physically fit or active child either. Instead, Peridot began showing quite the aptitude for learning and advanced problem solving.

It wasn’t long after she had turned five that Yvette insisted she be given an IQ test to see just what level of intellect her daughter was developing. After scoring well above average for her age Peridot was swiftly removed from her public school Kindergarten class at the wishes of her mother and placed in the care of a specially chosen set of tutors.

Yvette had told her it was to “nurture her intellectual gift” and that she was far more special than the other kids she had only barely gotten to know in the few months she had been with them. Peridot had initially been excited about the change, believing that she would get to see her mother more often now that she was special…

It didn’t take long for that excitement to turn to disappointment when she realized that not only was her mother not going to spend more time with her, but that she was never going to go back and see the other kids she had met at the Kindergarten.

Peridot would never know what it was like to grow up with friends…to learn firsthand how to share and how to make up after a fight…she was completely oblivious…

Through the years Peridot was given one intelligence test after another, sometimes every other month, due to her mother’s ever increasing interest in her daughter’s intellectual progress. Almost all Peridot knew was tests and classwork as she was given one new tutor after another, spending hours upon hours every day “honing her gift” to make her mother proud…despite her mother never actually being around to tell her if she was…

However, there were times when Peridot would complete her assigned tests and homework faster than her tutors had expected which left the rest of her day free for her to do as she pleased. When it had first happened Peridot didn’t know what she should do and ended up sitting in her room the whole night doing nothing.

After a few more times of having a whole night to herself Peridot began to crave those moments of freedom. Sometimes even acting like she was having trouble grasping a certain concept so she could breeze through her classwork once her tutors left for the day.

Peridot’s coveted free time was spent almost exclusively watching TV shows and movies. The idealistic “normal life” often portrayed in sitcoms and family friendly movies, a life where friends and family cared about you no matter what and loved you for who you were without consequence, was something Peridot felt herself yearning for more and more with each passing month.

It wasn’t even a week after her nineteenth birthday that Peridot finally snapped and went off on Yvette not ten minutes after the older woman had walked into the house after a long business trip.

Peridot threatened to disown herself, to run away and never come back, if she was not granted the chance at having what she deemed a normal life. Peridot demanded freedom, the ability to make her own choices, make her own friends and most importantly the ability to leave the house she had been confined to her entire life.

It was a threat Yvette did not take lightly, especially since she had already begun planning how Peridot would be integrated into her business in the coming years. First as tech support, then lead development before being made Yvette’s personal assistance and finally taking over the company.

To say that Yvette was not happy about Peridot’s sudden demands would be understating it quite harshly.

There were a lot of heated words exchanged, some shouting on Peridot’s part and a lot of unneeded property damage, but in the end Yvette finally relented on the condition she attend the university in the next town over and did not graduate with anything less than a 4.0 grade average with honors.

Not even a month later Peridot moved into her new three bedroom apartment. Yvette had spared no expense and got her one of the nicest flats within three blocks from the main campus and for maybe the first time in her life Peridot was thankful for her mother’s level of wealth.

Peridot had the wind at her back, a full register of classes in her hand and was finally ready to have the “normal life” she had seen so often on her favorite TV shows and movies! Sadly, despite how often she daydreamt about it Peridot had no real idea what it meant to be considered “normal”.

Socially awkward, almost always blatantly rude and having a perceived “meanness” about her Peridot quickly became an outcast amongst her peers. No matter how hard she tried she couldn’t quite pick up on the social cues that others seemed to find rather obvious.

Slowly that perceived meanness became an accurate part of her personality, the idea that she was cold and distant became true and Peridot all but gave up on the idea of having the “normal life” she had craved for so long.

That was when she had met Steven.

He exploded into her life and flipped her world upside down. It was thanks to him that she learned of her Autistic nature and why certain social concepts were so hard for her to grasp. It was thanks to him that she found people who could understand her and who tried to be patient with her despite how “rude” she often was.

It was thanks to Steven that she had the life she did now and while it wasn’t at all “normal” by the standards that TV shows and movies had set, it was _her_ normal and she loved it.

Then, one morning a few months after Steven and his Gems came into her life she went to go get coffee with Amethyst Quartz-Universe…it was a moment that Peridot still looked back on with mixed emotions.

On one hand it was the moment that she truly made her first friend, Steven didn’t really count as he was more of her guardian angel by that point, on the other hand it was the moment that she openly invited the chaos that was Amethyst to run rampant in her once mundane and predictable life.

Late nights bleeding into dozy morning classes with lectures lost on her due to lack of sleep, bad habits gained like Peridot’s now unhealthy addiction to energy drinks and more than a few close calls with the local police force was only the tip of the ice burg when it came to the “adventures” they had as Amethyst liked to call them.

The biggest downside to being friends with the small latina in Peridot’s mind was her known use of peer pressure to get what she wanted and while Amethyst would argue she never pushed for anything that was harmful, Peridot often disagreed...although that might partially be due to her bitterness at never being able to tell Amethyst no since she had never had the chance to build any sort of immunity to the social construct that was peer pressure.

Which was how Peridot had ended up in the position she was currently in, sitting on her own damn couch with a nasty can of beer in one hand as her and her “friends” played truth or dare for what felt like the millionth time in the past few weeks.

“Okay P-Dot, I dare you to go bring me a pair of your roomies panties before she gets back from her dare!” Amethyst shouted, a cheeky grin on her lips as she bounced excitably in place beside Peridot on the couch. “I’m gonna wear them on my head, her face will be priceless when she walks in and sees them!”

Yes, friendship was a mistake…at least with this one…

“Ha! I bet all she has is thongs and you’ll snap them in half with your big head as soon as you try to put them on!” Lars sneered from the bean bag he was sitting on across the room.

…that one too…

Sadie offered Peridot a sympathetic smile as she was quickly shooed from the couch by Amethyst. An angry sigh slipping passed Peridot’s lips as she made her way back towards the bedrooms, or more accurately towards her roommate’s bedroom.

Lapis Lazuli.

Peridot had quite a few run-ins with the surfer girl before she had met Steven, none of which were looked back on fondly. Lapis had confessed that she had hated the smaller girl and Peridot wouldn’t be honest if she had claimed that she never felt an equal amount of distain for the blunette.

Steven brought the two together after Lapis’ rather nasty breakup with the local quarterback Jasper. The surfer needed a place to stay and Peridot had an extra room, Steven claimed it to be a no-brainer since he was unaware of their rather complicated past.

It seemed a little far-fetched that the two would eventually come around to being friends, but that was exactly what had happened and while Amethyst might have been Peridot’s first friend Lapis had quickly become her best friend.

Peridot helped Lapis through the turmoil of her old relationship and Lapis helped Peridot through the turmoil of her upbringing, it was slow progress but it only made them that much closer in the end.

Which is why Peridot felt so incredibly dirty walking into Lapis’ room unannounced and uninvited, with the only goal to steal and embarrass the girl she had come to admire.

Stupid friends, stupid dare, stupid Amethyst for taking her phone and threatening to read her FanFiction out loud if she didn’t go through with it…

“Get a pair of her panties she says. It will be funny she says.” Peridot grumbles angrily under her breath as she quickly slips into the overly blue room. “I’m sorry Lapis…Ugh, I feel absolutely disgusting…”

Navigating the minefield of clutter that litters Lapis’ floor Peridot swiftly makes her way to the large dresser that sits on the opposite end of the room from the door. Muttering a few more curses under her breath Peridot quickly pulls open the bottom drawer, hoping it was Lapis’ underwear drawer, with the intention of snatching the first pair she could see so as not to invade Lapis’ privacy any more than she already is.

However, all Peridot’s thoughts ground to a sudden and abrupt halt when she looks down at the contents of the drawer. She had indeed chosen the correct drawer…the issue was, sitting right there on top of the rest of Lapis’ panties was a pair that undoubtedly belonged to Peridot.

Most of Peridot’s panties were normal pastel colored cotton ones, occasionally decorated with little polka-dots or stripes. Finding a pair like that in with Lapis’ wouldn’t have been all that surprising, after all Lapis did have a pension for stealing her clothes like her hoodies. It was pretty common for socks and such to get stuck in the pockets of Peridot’s baggier clothes after all.

Plus they often missed smaller articles of clothes when emptying the washer or dryer so having clothes get mixed up was an almost daily occurrence.

No, the problem was that the pair of panties sitting in front of her wasn’t one of her plentiful plain cotton panties…they were her _special_ panties, the only pair she owned made with black silk and decorated with little green alien heads. They were the pair she always wore when she…

Well she wasn’t a prude! Sure she had no actual experience due to living a sheltered life, but she had learned very quickly what it had meant to be aroused once she started living with Lapis and learned she was attracted to girls…especially hot surfer girls…

A bright red blush formed on Peridot’s cheeks as she snatched the small garment from the drawer. Her mind bubbling with the memories of what she last did in those panties and the fantasies that had spurred her on.

It was when she finally held the pair of silk panties in her hand that her mind slammed to a halt once again, mercifully distracting her from the growing dampness in her current pair. After a moment of staring blankly at the undergarments Peridot realized that they were still dirty from the last time they had been “used”, which made no sense because Peridot was very careful about hiding them when they were clean and even more so when they were dirty. Making sure they were taken to the wash almost immediately after she was done “wearing” them.

She hadn’t been able to wash them immediately like she had wanted the last time, Lapis had unexpectedly come home much earlier than Peridot had planned, but they had been tucked away in their secret hiding place so how could they have ended up in Lapis’ room…?

…did Lapis…?

Muffled laughter from the living room broke Peridot out of her jumbled mess of thoughts. She had completely forgotten about the others being over and their stupid game…now Lapis was most likely back from her dare.

Several strange, unnameable emotions swirled around in Peridot’s stomach and since she couldn’t seem to place any of them she simply stood from where she had been crouched and walked back out into the living room.

Amethyst and Lars were trying their best to not laugh, holding their mouths with their hands and only letting the occasional snicker and gasp of laughter slip out. Sadie still had the same sympathetic look on her face that she had offered Peridot earlier and Lapis…well Lapis had a rather smug, almost sneer like look on her face as she swept her eyes over Peridot as soon as the tiny blond stepped into the room.

“Well hello there Miss Panty Thief, find anything you like in there?” Lapis spoke in a sarcastic and teasing tone causing Amethyst and Lars to finally lose their composer and openly guffaw at the accused panty thief.

Something inside Peridot snapped and all those unnamed emotions were suddenly clouded by one single feeling.

Anger.

Peridot was **mad** at how her privacy had been violated and thanks to perceiving Lapis’ tone as mocking and condescending, instead of simply teasing, the blunette was placed as the one and only focal point for Peridot’s sudden burst of outrage.

“Why yes I did in fact and speaking of **_panty stealing any idea why THESE were in with yours?_**” Peridot spoke calmly for about four seconds before she laced her voice with venom as she held up the pair of panties in front of Lapis’ face.

Lapis’ face blanched as she caught sight of the garment in Peridot’s hands. She had completely forgot that she still had those in her room and had never expected Peridot to go looking through her clothes before she could return them.

The embarrassed red of Peridot’s face quickly darkened as she whipped herself up into a rage fueled frenzy. “**_This is absolutely UNACCEPTABLE Lapis! I don’t really get upset when you steal sips from my energy drinks, or when you insist on using my utensils instead of your own when you want to try a bite of whatever I’m eating!_**”

Lapis quickly brought her hands up to her chest in a show of surrender, opening her mouth to interject only for Peridot to shut her down with a venomous look and short snapping snarl.

“**_I allow you to use my loofa despite how UNSANATARY that is and how much you KNOW I don’t like it! I don’t make you go out and buy YOUR OWN pumice stones or nail files! I even let it slide when I caught you using my tooth brush! THREE SEPARATE TIMES!_**” Peridot growled lowly as she poked her finger in-between Lapis’ breast roughly forcing the taller and by far more physically fit woman to take a step backwards.

Lapis could do little more than gape like a fish out of water as her tiny roommate and best friend laid into her, not even giving her a chance to defend herself as she was slowly backed into the wall.

“**_You take my hoodies, my tee-shirts, my shorts! You steal my chapstick CONSTANTLY as well as my hairbrush! How many times have you taken MY bed for your after classes nap!?_**” Fangs barred Peridot jabbed her finger into Lapis’ chest one last time as she went in for the kill, completely lost in this newfound rage that she hadn’t even know she had been slowly building over the past several months.

For her part Lapis could only watch on with wide eyes as Peridot verbally tore her a new asshole, as there was little else she could do but stand there and take it. Stuttering guiltily every so often only got a rougher jab of Peridot’s tiny finger so Lapis chose to simply let the blonde’s rage run its course and try to mend what was left of the two’s relationship once Peridot finally allowed her to speak again.

“**_I have been very accepting of all of that, BUT STEALING MY PANTIES IS GOING TOO FAR! HOW DID YOU EVEN FIND THESE!? DO YOU SNOOP AROUND IN MY ROOM ON A REGULAR BASIS!? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW CREEPY THAT IS LAPIS!?_**” Peridot’s voice broke into a shrill scream as her rage, embarrassment and all the other emotions swirling around inside her collided with her sudden realization and rushed out her mouth as she stared at Lapis with an incredulous expression.

Now that Lapis had, more or less, been granted the freedom to speak her words failed her and she could only end up stuttering as she continued to stare wide eyed at the small blonde, cursing herself for getting even slightly distracted by the shorter girl’s vibrant green eyes in that moment.

Silence filled the room, aside from Lapis’ sputtering, for a minute or two before Amethyst suddenly spoke up with a clap of her hands. “Okay, okay let’s all just take a chill pill for a second.”

Peridot’s head whipped around to stare at Amethyst with wide eyes. In her rage fueled rant Peridot had completely forgotten about the other three sitting in the room and now that her little episode was over she felt the hot wash of shame begin to creep up her neck.

“Now don’t make that face P-Pod, I’m pretty sure you had every right to go off on ol’ Lappy here if even half of all that was true.” Amethyst said with a small chuckle, noticing the way Peridot had started to curl in on herself once she remembered that they were still in the room.

“I’d have kicked her to the curb the first time I found my tooth brush in her mouth.” Lars said with a snort as he finished off his beer, before reaching over and taking the unopened one Sadie had been holding.

“Now, now Lars I’m sure Lapis has a perfectly good reason for doing all the, admittedly kind of creepy stuff she has been doing, right Lapis?” Sadie spoke encouragingly as she gave the blunette a small smile and Peridot could almost hear Sadie saying something to Lapis through that smile.

“Yeah I’m sure Lapis has a profound reason for why she smells Peri’s dirty panties while grinding her pillow.” Amethyst laughs loudly at her own crude assumptions. “Or while grinding Peri’s pillow!”

“I don’t sniff her panties _while_ I grind on her pillow!” Lapis snaps back having finally found her voice, only to blush and start stuttering again once she realizes what she just said and at the looks the others are now giving her.

“Look Peri I’ve only ever taken your pillow like twice, three times tops! Plus I only ever sniff you panties when I’m having a rough day or I’m super wired…” Lapis began to speak a mile a minute, feeling more and more like she has just ruined the best relationship she has ever had with another person with every second Peridot looked at her with that expression…

“What I mean to say is that I’m not trying to be super creepy it’s just you smell really nice and it makes me happy to, you know, indulge in that kind of stuff? I try to keep it as nonintrusive as I can and you never really looked like you minded and I didn’t want to take advantage of that, but it is just so hard with how cute you are…”

Lapis took a big gulp of air and found that her vision was starting to go blurry, which was a blessing and a curse. Sure, now she didn’t have to look at Peridot giving her that awful unexplainable expression. However, that also meant that she was now openly crying in front of people…something she hadn’t done since she had broken up with Jasper.

She had ruined her relationship with Jasper and now here she was ruining whatever it was that she had with Peridot.

“I just…I know I put up a front of being…like…like…I really, _really_, like you Peri! I know you don’t have feelings for me, hell even more so now…but I…I couldn’t give up these feelings in my chest and I…didn’t want to be thrown out and…and…I’M SORRY!”

Lapis’ choked breaths finally broke as she crumpled down the wall and started to sob. Peridot had made her feel whole, had accepted all the bad things about her and said that Lapis was perfect just the way she was. Lapis didn’t feel like a monster with Peridot, she could smile and laugh and not feel like the world was waiting around the corner to kick her in the junk…

…she didn’t want Peridot to hate her…

A sudden warmth captured her cheeks and forced Lapis’ gaze upwards. It was when Lapis felt her tears being brushed away that she realized that Peridot had cupped her face with her soft delicate hands.

Anger, disgust, disappointment or maybe even sadness were all emotions Lapis had expected to see gracing Peridot’s face. Gentle confusion and embarrassment were most definitely not on that list.

“You like me? In a r-romantic way, not a really good friend sort of way?” Peridot asked in a soft tone, looking at Lapis as if she had never seen the girl before or as if Lapis had suddenly grown an extra eye right in the middle of her forehead.

“Y-yeah.” Was all Lapis could bring herself to say as she was caught under the bright green spotlights that were Peridot’s eyes.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Peridot finally asked after a few silent minutes of observing Lapis’ face. “It would have saved us having meltdowns in front of the others.” The smaller girl said with a sigh as she pulled her hands away from Lapis’ face to instead grab the blunette’s hands to help her off the floor.

“I…” Lapis swallowed, allowing Peridot to help her to her feet before she continued. “I thought I had been pretty obvious…I brought you flowers and was always stealing your hoodies, m-making it really apparent that I was using them to get your scent.” Lapis scratched the back of her neck sheepishly as she blushed.

Peridot looked at her in shock and bewilderment, but when she opened her mouth to speak Lapis was the one to cut her off this time.

“After a while I tried to up my ante, stuff like stealing your pillows and smelling your hair during our good morning hugs…all the compliments and stuff…when you didn’t really respond to any of it I sort of figured you didn’t have any interest in me…” Lapis coughed into her fist awkwardly, averting her eyes from Peridot’s confused yet remorse filled expression.

It was Peridot’s turn to gape and flounder for words. How could she have been so _oblivious_ to Lapis’ feelings? How was it even possible for her to be _oblivious _to the lengths Lapis apparently went to show how much she like her? How can she be so-

“Oblivious…it’s like P-Dot’s M.O. Lappy, you of all people should know that!” Amethyst sighed heavily at just how stupid her two close friends were. “Although, it’s pretty sad that Lap’ went to such extremes and you still didn’t even have fraction of a clue Peri.”

“I didn’t know! Friend’s share clothes and stuff all the time!” Peridot snapped in her own defense, her face coloring deeply once again as she crossed her arms over her chest.

“They sure as hell don’t share tooth brushes! You are a nasty bastard Lapis!” Lars said with a snarky laugh, causing Lapis to flip him off which only made his laughter increase in volume.

“W-well yes! B-but…Lapis is, well Lapis and while I wasn’t thrilled it wasn’t…” Peridot began mumbling to herself as her face grew to an impossibly bright shade of red, before she snapped her head up and turned so suddenly to face Lapis that she caused the older girl to flinch slightly.

“I r-return your f-f-feelings Lapis, i-if you would p-perhaps like to m-maybe go out to get coffee with me s-sometime?” Peridot’s speech was a stuttering mess, but Lapis couldn’t bring herself to care about how the words were presented.

Lapis opened her mouth to agree a thousand times over before she was interrupted by none other than Sadie.

“Lapis, Peridot.” Sadie said with a small clap of her hands to gain their attention. “Please come over here and sit down, we are going to have a talk.”

Neither of the roommates liked the sound of that, but finding no way to argue against Sadie’s request the two silently nodded and made their way over to her before sitting side by side on the floor.

“Firstly, Lapis.” Sadie turned to look at Lapis, her smile shifting into something much more stern. “Your actions have been, in many ways, quite deplorable. If you had pulled some of the stunts you did on Peridot on anyone else you could very well have been lambasted and cast out from decent society.”

Lapis flinched slightly at the harshness of the other girl’s words, despite knowing well and good what she was saying was true. Lapis had been so afraid that she would be rejected by the smaller girl that she somehow came to the conclusion that as long as Peridot didn’t out right deny her actions anything she did was justified…which was awful of her, now that she reflected on it.

“Just because you are a girl doesn’t give you a free pass to steal another girl’s panties. You are extremely lucky that Peridot is willing to look past your transgressions and give you a chance. However, that doesn’t give you the right to continue doing what you have been!” Sadie narrowed her eyes at Lapis when the blunette opened her mouth to respond, successfully causing Lapis to remain silent before she turned to face Peridot.

“I know what you are going to say!” Peridot shouted loudly, causing the others to flinch slightly at the suddenness of her outburst. “I know there is a level for this kind of thing and I shouldn’t just allow people to walk over me a-and I should speak up more and I shouldn’t be so clodding oblivious to everything and-”

Sadie frowned slightly at how quickly Peridot was working herself into a panic attack and decided it was in everyone’s best interest to cut the small girl off before she caused herself to faint or something.

“Peridot, you just have to tell people to stop when they do stuff that you don’t like. Even if it’s one of your friends…even if its Lapis…” Sadie placed a reassuring hand on Peridot’s shoulder as she spoke, giving the other blonde yet another gentle smile.

“I- I don’t mind most of it…” Peridot mumbled under her breath causing the room to go silent, aside from Lapis whose breath caught in her throat before escaping in a small strangled whimper. “I guess I just got caught up in the fact that Lapis took my special- these- that is…” Peridot was blushing as bright as a lava lamp as she tried to get out what she needed to say without further outing herself and adding to her embarrassment.

Ah, who was she kidding? Amethyst and Lars were going to tease her forever about this…she might as well just be honest about everything and just accept the consequences…

“Lapis I don’t want you stealing my p-panties anymore! If you want to smell me when you are tired or sad then you need to come to the source from now on a-a-and if y-you need to h-have my scent for any form of r-r-release then I a-am not opposed to h-helping you in that regard e-either…”

Peridot’s embarrassed stammering slowly petered out as she directed her gaze to the floor just in front of her and began to fidget with her hands. Time seemed frozen around her and she was hyper aware of how still Lapis was sitting, but couldn’t bring herself to lift her gaze from the floor. Somewhere in the back of her mind a little voice was telling her this was all one big joke and Lapis actually didn’t like her in the same way Peridot liked her.

The tense atmosphere lasted for only a few brief moments before Lars shattered it by standing up from his bean bag chair with a shake of his head. “Poor oblivious nerd!” Lars laughed loudly as he made his way to the door, Peridot’s gaze snapping up and locking onto his back before flicking over to Amethyst who was now standing as well.

“Well now you’ve gone and done it P-Dot, your obliviousness knows no bounds! Good luck walking tomorrow!” Amethyst snickered as she too made her way to the door and once she caught up to Lars the two slipped out into the hallway, Peridot only caught the first few seconds of their deafening laughter before the door closed.

“Peridot. Do you really feel that way about Lapis? After everything she’s done?” Sadie asked in a very serious tone as she held Peridot’s face with both her hands, forcing Peridot to look her in the eyes. A small nod was all Peridot could offer as an answer as her mind was currently dumbstruck and confused at what was happening.

“No means no Lapis, don’t make me come back over here and scold you!” Sadie said with a small laugh of her own as she shook her head. “Make sure you go easy on her, you know it’s her first time!”

Peridot gave Sadie a confused look as her face was released from the older blondes grasp before turning to finally look at Lapis. The blunette had at some point gotten up from where she sitting cross legged on the floor and was now sat on her haunches with her hands balled up into fists resting in her lap. The exposed skin of Lapis’ arms and legs showed how her muscles were tensed, much like a coiled spring under too much pressure.

What attracted Peridot’s attention the most however was Lapis’ face. The dark blush that sat heavy on her cheeks, the labored breath that came out from between her lips in thick puffs and most of all the look in the taller girl’s eyes. It was a predatory look causing the image of a hungry wolf to flash through Peridot’s mind as a bolt of arousal shot through her core.

“W-wait Sadie!” Peridot weakly called out after the older girl as she was now unable to move, caught under Lapis’ hungry stare.

Sadie just chuckled as she quickly slipped out the door. She had been telling Lapis for weeks that Peridot wouldn’t reject her proposal to becoming girlfriends and would very much rub that fact in Lapis’ face tomorrow during their shift at the Big Doughnut. For now though she would let the two enjoy themselves, poor oblivious Peridot didn’t know what she was getting into…but Sadie had a feeling everything was going to end up just fine.

The last thing Sadie heard as she shut the door being her was the sound of Lapis springing off the floor to pounce on her new, rather oblivious, girlfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oblivious was supposed to be a simple Lapidot One-Shot. Lapis is a perv due to her crush on Peridot, while Peridot is completely oblivious to her roommate’s rather sketchy antics. It was supposed to be short, sweet and humorous…then I blew it up into a near 6,000 word mess, over half of which I feel does nothing to enhance the overall narrative…


	3. Untitled Sci-Fi Story- No Pairings - (SFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is categorized under: Unfinished.

** _ Sector 6-1-B | Planet 5-9-62 _ **

** _ Current Atmospheric / Geological Condition : Code 4 _ **

** _ Ion Grid Stability : 4.32-8 | Chance of Grid Shutdown : 46% _ **

** _ Identification Required | Peridot Facet-2F5L Cut-5XG : Authorized _ **

** _ Command Accepted : Initializing Full Reboot of Primary Core Functions _ **

** _ Time Remaining : 52 Hours 57 Minutes _ **

** _ Entering Hibernation Mode _ **

Peridot couldn’t contain the exasperated sigh that bubbled up in her chest as she surveyed the various command screens, making sure the repair process went smoothly and that the core shutdown did not experience any unregistered interruptions.

She had told her superiors that placing a grid node on such a barren and dusty sand planet would be more trouble than it was worth, but they had insisted and so here she was fixing a less than necessary facility for the ninth time that star chart.

Another sigh broke through her lips and into the relatively silent air of the command room now that most of the heavy machinery had fully shut down, leaving only a faint hum to echo off the walls.

With her main objective in this sector complete, at least for now, Peridot’s thoughts quickly shifted to the secondary problem she was now faced with. After taking a moment to compose herself and give her weaponry a quick functionally check, Peridot finally found herself walking towards the main loading bay.

There sitting at the far wall was the heir to Pink Diamond and the right hand to the Rebellion…or more accurately, the heir was seated while one of his mother’s most trusted generals lay unconscious on the floor next to him.

“Peridot you’re back!” The small child shouted in a voice that was far too cheerful for the situation he was in, but Peridot couldn’t deny how strangely fitting it was for him.

“I have completed my task of resetting the Ion Grid in this sector and have come to check on you and The Pearl.” Peridot spoke with as much detachment as she could, but she couldn’t help but feel something primal well up in her chest anytime she interacted with the small Diamond.

“We’re fine…well as fine as we can be I guess, Pearl is looking a lot better so the medicine you gave her must have really helped!” Steven smiled as he spoke, looking at Peridot with large emotion filled eyes…what emotion it was Peridot could not name, but it was rather oppressive whichever it was.

Deciding to not justify his words with a response Peridot instead crouched down beside the unconscious women to check Pearl’s vitals herself. “The Pearl is lucky you are as strong as you are, had you been unable to carry her here she would’ve been caught in this planet’s nightly sandstorm and would have surely died.”

Standing back up, after being satisfied that Pearl was indeed making progress toward recovery, Peridot opened one of her holoscreens and began to take inventory of the different machines and mechanical parts being stored in the loading bay.

“Well even if I couldn’t carry her the whole way I wouldn’t have just left her, it was my fault he was even hurt in the first place...” Steven frowned lightly and even though Peridot was no longer facing him she could hear the frown laced in his voice.

“Then you both would have died.” Peridot responded flatly, unsure of how or why she would try and cheer the smaller being up. If she were being honest she was unsure why she was helping them in the first place, they were enemies after all…

“Hey, how come all you do is work?” Steven asked with genuine curiosity after having stood and walked over to where Peridot was currently standing. He noticed how she jumped in surprise at the sudden closeness of his voice, but he refrained from saying anything so as not to embarrass her.

Peridot cleared the surprise from her throat with a quick cough, before glaring down at the boy who merely looked up at her with a beaming smile. “It is my job to work, I am nothing more than a tool for my Authority and a tool that does not work is cast into fire to be repurposed into something that does…I do not want to be recast, therefore I work.”

It was simple really, how the Crystal Gems or even the Pink Diamond failed to grasp that concept was an absolute mystery to her. Although looking at the deep-set frown now adorning The Steven’s face Peridot couldn’t help the feeling that maybe _she_ was the one who had failed to grasp at something seemingly well within her reach…

“You’re nobody’s tool! You are your own person and shouldn’t _belong_ to anybody!” Steven spoke with an uncharacteristic amount of anger seeping into his voice. Ever since he was old enough to go on missions with the Gems he had been told that the people who were apart of Homeworld were evil and unredeemable…but here Peridot was, standing in front of him and truly believing that she was no better than some spare hammer to be used and then thrown away…

It upset him on a level he didn’t quite understand.

Peridot was quite taken aback by the sudden anger Steven was displaying, having been wholly convinced through previous interaction that the boy simply could not get angry.

Nearly crushing him with a highly advanced mechanized loading lift? Perfectly acceptable. Fight his guardians to the point of injury in an abandoned testing facility? That was fine. Stop his mother’s fleet from coming to the aid of an outer rim space port who had pledged loyalty to her rebellion, sentencing all aboard to face prison sentencing or worse? Forgivable.

Speak the truth that she is an expendable tool, only useful to the Authority so long as she does her job and does her job well? That is cause for anger filled shouting…Peridot didn’t get it.

A soft groan coming from behind them cut any possible retort from Peridot’s mind as she quickly shifted her hovering fingers from her holo-screen to her plasma canon. She noted that The Steven’s frown did not lessen any as he watched her prepare for the possibility of an upcoming fight, however it did shift into a less angry and more remorseful look…Peridot simply didn’t understand.

“Pearl how are you feeling?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Untitled Sci-Fi Story was originally the start of a grand multi-chapter AU set in space with multiple planets and starship battles, or at least I think it was. To be honest this one has been sitting around in my folders for so long I couldn’t tell you a thing about the universe it once belonged too. I liked the characterization and how it flowed so I never deleted it in case it ever fit into a future project, so if it disappears from this collection of works expect to see it in a future stand-alone story.


	4. She's Mine - Lapidot? - (SFW/NSFW?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is categorized under: Unedited.

Peridot was well aware that she wasn’t the most pleasant person to be around in most cases. She was emotionally detached from most people due to having been raised by a mother who couldn’t have cared less about Peridot’s upbringing if she had actively put any thought into her own child’s life.

That emotional detachment made Peridot rather cold and menacing to those she felt were not worth her time, which was nearly everyone.

This of course did not include Steven Universe as he was an absolute ray of sunshine and rainbows. The younger boy was the only person Peridot felt she could open up to and he was the only one she would actively smile at.

Sure she could be a bit of a bitch, but she never thought someone would believe she deserved this…

“I can’t believe he said no! Tiny paraplegics are right up his crooked disgusting alley!”

“He claimed we were asking too much, even if we were telling the truth about her being a virgin.”

“Too much!? Fucker is looking to buy a living piece of meat to fuck and abuse, the hell he means ‘too much’!?”

“Yeah well, he must be hurting for cash. Not sure if I am happy or sad about that!”

“…I think the little scrote is listening.”

Suddenly the blindfold covering her eyes was yanked away and Peridot was left blinking into the dim light of what she assumed was a basement or some kind of cellar. Once her eyes adjusted to the rather poor lighting they immediately widened as she took in the two figures standing in front of her.

A rather large women with long bleach blonde hair and vitiligo sat crouched in front of her with what Peridot assumed was the blindfold in her hand. A smaller, blue haired woman stood just a few feet away from where Peridot lay with her back leaned against a concrete support beam with a smug smile on her face.

“Nice to see that blow to the head didn’t kill you, live meat is always more profitable.” The larger woman sneered as she stood back up to her full height, towing over the blunette and absolute dwarfing Peridot beneath her shadow.

Peridot vaguely remembered hearing a strange noise in her apartment late one night as she was working on various projects for the company she worked for. Upon going to check…well she couldn’t remember anything aside from the sudden pain that filled her skull, pain that was still tingling at the edge of her senses and probably would have been much worse if her terror wasn’t so all consuming in that moment.

“Your boss and senior coworkers must have absolutely hated you to go as far as to hire us.” The blue haired girl spoke softly, almost like she was trying to comfort Peridot despite the wicked look that sat on her face. “Bossy, rude and a big pain in the ass. ‘Please get rid of the know-it-all bitch’ is how I think their request had started.”

The two intimidating women shared a rather hearty laugh before the blue haired sprung forward to lean down into Peridot’s face, much closer than the giant woman had.

“Not so big and bad now, are you princess?” Lapis asked with that same soft voice as she drug a fingernail over Peridot’s cheek.

Peridot couldn’t help but squeak out a pitiful little whine of fear as she froze in terror, her appendage less limbs trembling under the woman’s touch.

The woman froze for a moment before a large smile bloomed on her face. “Jasper, I think I want her…we are going to keep her!” The woman said with a proud little huff as she looked up at the giant, apparently Jasper, just in time to see the large woman slap a hand to her forehead.

“Lapis no, do you realize how much money she is worth? She is pathetically small and came de-limbed, we won’t find a better money maker that that!” Jasper growled as she tried to pull Lapis to her feet, but the blunette simply shrugged off her grasp.

“I have the money Jasper, I don’t waste my share on piss water and whores!” Lapis snarled at the bigger women, before directing her gaze back towards Peridot. “Tell me princess…are you scared of me?” Lapis asked as she produced a switchblade seemingly out of thing air and brought it close to Peridot’s face.

Peridot did all she possibly could to try and convey that, yes she was absolutely terrified of the taller women. However, with her mouth gagged and a large knife pressed against her cheek all she could really do was whimper and sob as she pissed herself in front of her kidnappers.

“Ha, I think that’s your answer Lapis! You better not let her piss everywhere if you bring her upstairs!” Jasper laughed roughly as she turned to head back up the stairs.

Lapis rolled her eyes as she drug the back of her knife across Peridot’s cheek and up her nose before flipping it closed and putting it back wherever she had retrieved it. “First I have to break her, then we can work on house training!” Lapis called after the retreating women with a laugh, before standing herself.

“Now you be a good girl while I’m gone and there will be no punishments okay?” Lapis asked sweetly as she bent over to remove the gag from Peridot’s mouth. “I expect words Peri.” Lapis said with a stern edge to her voice after a few moments of silence, aside from Peridot’s now audible sobbing, passed between them.

“Y-y-yes ma’am…” Peridot forced out after another few moments as she instinctively curled in on herself a little more.

“Hmm, not sure if I like being called ma’am…we will have to work on it and don’t worry so much princess, if you are a good girl and do as you’re told I will make sure you are comfortable and happy…I’m sure I don’t need to tell you what will happen if you aren’t a good girl…” Lapis’ voice dropped to a dangerously low and threatening tone as she spoke the tail end of her statement.

After getting another small squeak of affirmation from Peridot Lapis turned and followed Jasper up the stairs.

Peridot slowly lowered her head to the floor as she felt her whole body scream in fear and pain and sadness…this was going to be her life now…she was going to be this Lapis’ toy, maybe her pet if Peridot was lucky…

In the dim light of a foreign basement, with the only reminder of her previous life being the now soiled alien print pajamas that clung to her body, Peridot sobbed.

Until Lapis returned to retrieve her…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> She’s Mine was another unexpected idea that struck me rather suddenly. I had the idea in my head all day at one point and it was far more fleshed out, with a full universe and cast. I could probably make this into a larger NSFW story, but I am sticking to my unedited guns and I am leaving it as is for now. This was written in one sitting so if it is messy or slightly off to read then I apologize, but I don’t want to risk ruining the idea by overworking it…besides, I’m fairly bad at writing NSFW stories anyway…


	5. Untitled Occult AU - Pearlyamory x Peridot - (SFW/NSFW?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is categorized under: Unfinished.

This was not supposed to be happening…

How had she gotten here…?

How had she been tamed…?

Why did…**_the shadow_**…smell so good…?

“It’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you little one.”

Why was her vision fading…?

Was she dying…?

“I’m going to take you home with me. You’ll be safe there.”

She didn’t want to die…

Why wasn’t she afraid…?

Why was the shadow’s touch so cold…?

“Just sleep. We can talk once you’ve regained your strength.

Why was she so tired…?

Why…

…

Peridot had, over the course of her relatively short life, suffered more than one would expect given her snappish attitude and the arrogant manner which she carried herself. Born to a mother who did not want her, she was quickly cast aside along with the man who should have been her protector and guardian.

Father was the last thing she would call that man now after everything he had done to her…

The man hated her, blamed her for the way he had been cast aside by the woman he still believed loved him. She was barely able to walk when the beating first started. Barely able to speak when his alcohol induced rage caused him to pick her small form up and throw her against the wall.

A normal child would have surly died from such treatment, but Peridot was no normal child.

No, Peridot was different.

Peridot was born a λυκάνθρωπος… a Werewolf.

It was highly uncommon for the curse of Lycanthropy to manifest itself in a child still developing in the womb of their mother. In fact, there were no medical records of such births ever taking place only rumors spread by word of mouth late at night when it was more common to speak of such topics.

Peridot’s birth would also be expunged from the hospital’s records. Leaving no record of her birth, nor what shame it brought upon her would be mother. To the country and state, the public at large she did not exist…and that meant there was no accountability for her life.

Normal children grew, went to school, made friends…Peridot knew nothing of those things, she only knew pain and fear. Her first vibrant memory was of breaking a small plate on accident as she tried to clean the table after a meal. She could not recall what age she had been at the time, but she could remember the searing pain she felt in the back of her head when the man swung the cast iron pan down onto her skull.

She could clearly remember the way her head throbbed, the smell of her own blood and the sound of the wolf inside her head screaming in anger. The way the wolf in her tried to claw its way out and take vengeance on the man for inflicting such visceral pain upon her.

Alas Peridot had been too young, unable to even fully comprehend her true state of being let alone draw out the wolf and its latent power.

The man had left her lying there. For nearly two days, before a swift kick to her stomach brought her back to the waking world. Life had been nothing but varying degrees of pain from that point on, some days worse than others. When she remembered all her chores and made no mistakes the beatings weren’t as severe, and Peridot reveled in those days…however, when she did something wrong the man spared no amount of energy to punish her.

The cast iron pan was one of the less severe punishments…and the older Peridot got the more she cursed the wolf, often longing for her suffering to end only to wake from the cold abyss of unconsciousness to find her wounds healing forcing herself to continue on, lest she incur more of the man’s wild fury.

It was sometime after she had turned ten that the man began to use her as a substitute for the wife he had lost. It was in those moments that Peridot longed for the beatings with the pan or knife…it was in those moments that he hurt her the most…

Often during her beatings the mad would remain quiet or merely make angered noises, sometimes calling her stupid or worthless. However, during the moments when he used her he would talk with her, degrade her and tell her how she drove away the woman who loved him.

Peridot had always felt small, never having a chance to see or interact with other children made her feel isolated and tiny in comparison to the man. But it was in those moments that Peridot began to understand what it felt like to feel small emotionally and mentally.

Instead of being shouted at, being called worthless for breaking a plate, she was given a detailed account of just how worthless she was. The words still held anger, years of bile and venom behind each syllable, but the man never raised his voice in those moments.

It cut Peridot to her core. She was a monster…she tore apart two people who loved each other…she couldn’t do anything right…it was her place to be his punching bag…his toy…

The wolf howled deep from the recesses of her mind, but she had forced it so far down she could no longer here it cry.

As the years went on her tears started to dry up as she began to fully accept her position as the man’s release. The older she got the better she became at the house work, no longer did she break dishes or forget to mop the floor. The man still found reasons to beat and mutilate her, but the beatings did slow.

Life began to take on some semblance of normality for Peridot. Once her chores were done and she triple checked everything was right she would often find herself lose in the pages of a book. Sometimes it would be a fantasy novel sometime a medical journal, whatever she could get her hands on she would read and quickly found she had a passion for learning.

Once the man came home she would make sure she was out of sight yet readily available should he call and once he was asleep she would return to her books.

This was her life, day after day, until one afternoon she heard the front door open long before the man was supposed to be home.

“Clean the place out of anything valuable and find the Were’, boss wants it unharmed.”

Peridot had placed her broom down and slowly made her way out of the kitchen towards the front of the house. There, standing in the doorway was a tall man wearing a long coat and wide brimmed hat, a lit cigar hanging from his lips.

Beside him on his knees was the man, face swollen and bloody with his hands tied behind his back.

“Ah there it is, come over here beastie.”

The tall man beckoned with a rough laugh and Peridot felt she had no choice but to comply. Once she was close enough the man placed a hand on her shoulder, squeezing tightly as if to say she was not to move away from him.

“See your dad here has a bit of a problem, gained a lot of debt at our casino.”

The tall man laughed again as he snapped his fingers and two of the others rummaging around the house walked over and began to drag her ‘dad’ towards the center of the room. She watched mutely as her ‘dad’ pleaded for his life, offering her to them in exchange for their mercy.

“Tried to cheat us out of what we were owed, now he is paying for it.”

Peridot watched as her ‘dad’ was stripped, beaten and finally hung from the ceiling fan. She watched him choke and gasp for air, she felt the grip on her shoulder tighten and when one of the other men grabbed a knife and eviscerated her ‘dad’ where he hung she heard the wolf howl for the first time in years…

Peridot’s mind was in turmoil as she walked away from the house and towards a slick black limousine, the sudden smell of fire making her flinch, but she couldn’t bring herself to look back. The men were chatting happily with one another as they piled into the vehicle the last one pushing Peridot inside.

What the talked about, where they went, how long they had been traveling…it was all a blur Peridot as she relived years of torment at the hands of her ‘dad’ and trying to figure out what it was she was trying to feel in the moment she watched the life drain from his eyes…

“Ah there is my new pet! Come in, I do hope you’re house broken.”

Peridot’s eyes snapped up, finding herself in a large lavish room. There sitting in the center of the room clad in an expensive looking silk robe was stout balding man, his yellowed teeth shaped into a lecherous grin.

He dismissed the men who had apparently escorted her to his room and once they were alone tugged open his robe and he gestured her over...

The man was both easier and yet hard to please than her previous ‘owner’ as he called it. While she was no longer expected to cook and clean, she was now not simply used, but was expected to learn and perform what the man liked.

Beatings with iron and steel were exchanged with biting whips inlaid with glass, slices and stabs with kitchen knives were replaced with cigar stubs being snuffed out on her body and those moments of being used each night began multiple activities a day, sometimes alone…sometimes with the man’s acquaintances and friends…

No longer could she read her books, instead she was to sit and look pretty while he worked…until he unzipped his pants and beckoned her over…

The wolf inside her mind went rampant almost daily, shrieking in indignation every time she was forced to wear a collar or was washed down with a simply garden hose. Peridot was too numb to care, unable to force it back deeper into her mind nor able to allow it to take control of her physical form.

Soon she started acting just like the animal she was treated as…

“Damn them! Can’t they just leave us the hell alone? Is it because of the Bitch? Well get rid of her then, the last thing I need is that coven making a mess of my business!”

Suddenly, just like that she was being led away. Peridot felt herself begin to perk up, her mind long since numb began to take stock of everything happening around her. She was leaving, the man didn’t want her as his pet anymore!

The long dormant feeling of dread washed over her, surly they wouldn’t just let her go free…no they were going to take her somewhere and kill her like they had done with her ‘dad’. Fear wracked her body as she began to look around in panic as she was dragged toward the limousine. The wolf in her mind howled and clawed, practically begging to be set free so it could save them…but it was too late, Peridot had suppressed the wolf for so long she now had no idea how to let it free…

She was dragged out of the vehicle and into a large grimy warehouse, shivering in fear Peridot was quickly dragged to the center of the room and forced up onto a small makeshift stage. The lights shining onto the stage were blinding her, but she could hear someone say something about biding and then several other voice spoke up with ever increasing numbers.

There was a sudden bang, which caused Peridot to flinch, followed by a shrill cheer. A moment of silence passed before Peridot felt herself being dragged off the stage and back out of the warehouse, this time through a different door.

“I can’t believe how lucky I am! Werewolves are practically extinct!”

Peridot only caught a glimpse of who had said those words before she was blinded once again, this time by the sun. Once she was thrown into the back of a large truck and the blur from her sight faded she saw her new ‘owner’ for the first time.

The woman was hideous, makeup covering her gnarled and uneven features. Her lips were pulled back into at large grin, reveling several missing teeth, as she stared at Peridot.

“You will bring me so much business! I’ll be even richer than I already am!”

The woman spoke with a laugh as she slammed the doors shut, leaving Peridot in complete darkness.

“That nasty little rat was more effort than he was worth.”

The woman spoke with a disinterested huff as she turned and began to walk away. Peridot felt her heart drop into her stomach as she saw sitting behind where the woman had been standing was the Wererat...

Stiff, frozen in what appeared to be terror, with small black beads where his bright yellow eyes had been…

The woman had caught him…

The woman had…killed him…

She had him stuffed…and set up as a decoration…

Tears that had dried up long ago began to roll down Peridot’s cheeks as she reached her hand out between the bars, desperately trying to reach the Wererat. The only creature to be kind to her in her entire life…the one who had promised to get her help…the one who spoke so highly of the wretched world she was born into…

The wolf did not howl.

The wolf did not claw.

The wolf did not rage inside her mind.

The wolf asked to be set free…

…Peridot agreed…

A guttural, blood chilling howl tore through the quiet night air as the sound of clicking bones and ripping flesh echoed through the room. The large bipedal wolf roared in feral rage as it tore the cage it was in to pieces.

The first guard to burst into the room couldn’t even make a sound before he was tore apart. The wolf sinking its claws into the man’s chest and tearing open his ribcage, ripping the still pulsing organs from the cavity.

The second and third quickly followed as the wolf made short work of them, tearing their limbs from their body and crushing their skulls between its hands. The whole facility went up in alarm as the wolf rampaged from one room to the next ripping and tearing its way through the countless workers and staff.

Some of the guards tried their best to stop the wolf, utilizing guns and fire, even silver…nothing worked to slow the wolfs rampage. Too long it had been pent up, forced to watch the suffering Peridot endured, not it would take vengeance on those who had wronged her.

The other captive creatures pleaded and begged for their freedom, but the wolf did not have ears for their plight. Its only goal was to kill every last person who worked at this damned facility and so once it was finished with its slaughter it proceeded to the next room, ignoring the pleas of the creatures it left behind.

At some point the building itself caught on fire, but it did not deter the wolf as it continued on with its slaughter. Finally reaching the woman’s office where she was cowering in fear…the wolf made quick work of her, covering the woman’s office in her remains.

With The Wolfs thirst for vengeance somewhat sated now it began to slowly succumb to its numerous wounds. Countless burns, cuts and bullet holes began to take its toll

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Untitled Occult AU was a weird thing to have happened. One day I was like "Man I want a Peridot Werewolf story, but I don't want it to be generic..." so I went ahead and molded this idea in my head. It would've been a multi-chapter story following a coven of four vampires (The Pearls) taking in a wounded and abused Werewolf (Peridot) and all the hi-jinks that would follow. Peridot learning to trust and ultimately love. Yellow treating Peridot like an animal at first, but coming around to spoiling her the most out of the four. Pearl just being the mom of the group and keeping everyone in line. Blue breaking Peridot's walls first and being all cuddly. White (or Peep if you will) helping teach Peridot how to control her powers and often helping her get away when the other three are too overbearing. Sadly the more I wrote of the blasting thing the darker it got so I simply dropped it even though I had some many cute little ideas. This is all that's left after a series of cuts and rewrites and deletions...maybe one day I'll come back to it until then, here it stays.


	6. Untitled Corruption AU - Bislapidot - (SFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is categorized under: Unfinished.

_*Hissssss*_

“Oh come on now Tiny, I got tasty yum-yums for you!”

_*HISSSSSSSSSS*_

“Ugh, LAPIS! Tiny won’t get out of my blast furnace!”

“Did you try giving her the treats? Steven said that’s how Pearl got her out of their stove last time.”

“I tried, but she won’t take them!”

“Well, you might just have to leave her until she wants to come out. You know how she gets, especially about warm places.”

“No way! I have stuff to do in preparation for the big event next week! I can’t just tell Steven to find _another_ bismuth!”

“I’m sure everyone will understand though… Come on Peri don’t you want to come out of there? You’re gonna give Biz an aneurism.”

_*MMRRRRRRR HISS*_

“Okay Tiny you leave me no choice! You are coming out of there right no-OW! She bit me!”

“Well you shouldn’t have put your hand in there! You probably scared her, poor baby.

“What else am I supposed to do? I need her out of there! I’m sorry Tiny, but you gotta come out- OW! Ow, ow, ow Strata! How are your teeth so sharp!?”

_*RROWUUU HISS RRROOOOWW HISSSSSSSSS*_

“Bismuth! Be careful you’re gonna hurt her! Here give her to me, you’re okay Peri I got you.”

_*Hiss mrrrrrrrrrr*_

“I was being careful! Look I’ll builder her a nice little hiding spot later, but for now I need to get started since I’m already so far behind.”

“How are your hands?”

“Fine… Really Blue, I’m fine. Why don’t you take Tiny back home and watch your show? I’ll be back later and if she is done being all prickly we can cuddle, sound good?”

“Okay. Don’t work too hard, come on Peri let’s go home.”

_*Hiss*_

“Oh don’t take that tone with me missy, you know better than to hide in Biz’s equipment! You are lucky you’re so cute otherwise I’d put you in time out.”

_*Purrrrrr Purrrrrr Purrrrrr*_

“Yeah act all cute now that you’ve been caught. I hope you keep the habit of purring like this once we figure out how to heal you…”

_*Merrow*_

“Sorry Peri, I know there’s no need to get all soppy…after all if there is anyone who can figure out how to fix your corruption it’s Steven, he just needs some more time is all! Hey let’s go watch some Camp Pining Hearts huh? Enough of all this crying and sad talk…”

_*Purrrrrr*_

“Yeah…I thought you’d say that…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Untitled Corruption AU is a concept that really came out of nowhere (as you may have guessed from the lack of actual substance to this story). There is no background in my head for this one, no cause for corruption decided or anything. Literally the idea of a Peridot acting akin to a feral cat while corrupted and the other gems trying to deal with it popped into my head and then spilled out into whatever this mess can be described as. So I doubt anything will come from this ever, but who knows maybe I can recycle this for a story later on that I do have some form of background on.


	7. Crystal Gem Harem AU - (SFW)

“Ha! You really think you could top me runt?” Jasper laughed, a shit-eating smirk growing on her lips as she looked up at Amethyst from where she was lounging on the couch. 

“Top you? I would dominate your ass, easy!” Amethyst puffed out her chest with pride, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively at Jasper only making Jasper laugh a bit louder.

Garnet smiled wryly as she leaned back into her chair. The fusion had been waiting for the day when they would discuss their relationship dynamics, after all it was quite amusing to hear what each of the gems thought they were compared to how they actually acted during intimate moments.

“Oh yeah? Like you dominate the fusion?” Jasper asked with a tone of faux innocent, her grin only growing at the light violet dusting that overtook Amethyst’s cheeks.

“Now, now Jasper.” Garnet said coolly as she ghosted her right hand over Amethyst’s cheek. “There is no need to tease so much is there?” The taller gem punctuated her statement with a gentle squeeze to Amethyst’s cheek, rubbing her thumb over the corner of the purple gems mouth.

Amethyst’s reaction was exactly what Garnet had wanted, the younger gem blushing brightly as she tried to defend herself. “So I can’t top Garnet, nobody not even you Jasper, can top Garnet!”

“No one eh? I wonder about that…” Bismuth spoke softly as she brought her arms around Garnet’s shoulders and despite the fusions best efforts she blushed at the contact.

Jasper howled in laughter, nudging Amethyst with her foot. “So you bottom out to me, the fusion and probably Bismuth as well. Are you sure you are, how did you put it? ‘One of the main tops around here’ or some such nonsense.”

“Oh you think you are ‘sexy’ and ‘in control’, but I top both Pearl and Lapis who I recall both _dominate your ass_!” Amethyst sniped, sticking her tongue out briefly before smirking evilly and shoving Lapis towards Jasper and subsequently into the large gems lap.

“Hmm she has a point… I do enjoy doing whatever I want with your delicious ass…” Lapis’ voice came out sultry and alluring as she leaned down to nibble at one of Jasper’s ears, causing the orange gems haughty attitude to immediately falter much to Amethyst’s delight.

Garnet and Bismuth grinned at how quickly Jasper turned to putty when Lapis was involved, especially since it was true that Jasper topped, or at least vied for the top, in almost every situation she was in.

“Pearl doesn’t count as she is more of a power-bottom then a top!” Jasper spoke through gritted teeth, desperately trying to ignore Lapis, who was getting increasingly bolder with her touching and nipping.

“Power-bottom? I think I do a more than adequate job topping!” Pearl muttered, offended by the insinuation that she wasn’t good at topping despite knowing on several occasions she had been the one in control of their little sessions of intimacy.

“You do a fine job when you are on top Pearl, you just don’t get that position very often.” Garnet said with a slight tease to her voice which caused Pearl to blush at the hidden meaning. “Besides, being a power-bottom is nothing to sneer at since it essentially gives you the best of both worlds.”

“Hmm I suppose…” Pearl muttered again, not quite convinced although more than willing to drop the subject if it meant directing the embarrassing conversation away from herself.

“If it makes you feel better Pearl I enjoy when you top me…” Lapis flashed Pearl a sultry smile, licking her lips, as her hands slid under Jaspers top eliciting a strangled noise from her prey.

“What about me?”

The whole room froze for a moment, before all eyes were directed at the small green gem sitting on the floor near the kitchen. Peridot’s eyes held a certain expectancy as she awaited their input and the others quickly found themselves getting lost in those bright verdant orbs.

Tiny, cute, easily flustered, quirky, innocent, extremely intelligent, passionate, soft…

“Bottom.” Came the unanimous reply from the rest of the gems, light blushes dusting all of their cheeks as their minds went wild with images and imaginations.

“Wh-What! No way, surely I top at least one of you? Like Pearl! I could totally top Pearl!” Peridot shouted, her expression fell to one of disbelief at the insinuation that she was the only crystal gem who was simply unable to be on top.

“I don’t think so Peri, you are awfully squishy when it comes to being intimate.” Lapis said with an airy giggle knowing, maybe better than any of the others, just how quickly Peridot melted when shown affection.

Pearl was not going to take that statement lying down! It was bad enough the others didn’t think she could be their top, she most certainly wasn’t going to let Peridot have the notion that Pearl was her bottom!

“Are you sure you can top me Per-i-dot?” Pearl whispered directly into Peridot’s ear as she snaked her arms around the smaller gem from behind, pulling Peridot into her lap as she quickly sat down on the floor.

“I-I am certain that y-your ministraTIONS a-a-are lost on such a-” Peridot’s little rant was cut short as a small moan escaped her lips, thanks to Pearl leaning down to bite at the smaller gems neck.

“I wasn’t aware a top could also be a ‘pillow princess’, hmm Peridot?” Pearl spoke teasingly, her lips ghosting over the green gems skin as she spoke before nipping lightly at the skin once again.

Peridot was a panting and blushing mess within seconds, her stern look of defiance melting into a pleasure glazed expression. Needy wonton moans slipping out into the air every few seconds as Pearl continued to lavish Peridot’s exposed skin with little kisses and bites.

The smallest gem did everything she could to fight off the haze of pleasure that Pearl began forcing into her mind, but no matter how much she told herself she wouldn’t get aroused by Pearls actions she still slipped back into the role ‘bottom’.

Her role.

Through her pleasure glazed thoughts Peridot only barely managed to here Amethyst speak up in a rather husky sounding voice.

“Steven is out for the whole day…I think we have plenty of time to see if little Per-bear truly is a bottom…to all of us.”

“Oh my stars…”

* * *

Garnet – Pearl | Top – Bottom (Sometimes Garnet lets Pearl top)

Garnet – Amethyst | Top – Bottom

Garnet – Lapis | Top – Bottom

Garnet – Jasper | Top – Top (Always a Power Struggle)

Garnet – Bismuth | Bottom – Top

Amethyst – Pearl | Top – Bottom

Amethyst – Lapis | Top – Power-Bottom

Amethyst – Jasper | Bottom – Top (Always a Power Struggle, Amethyst just always loses)

Amethyst – Bismuth | Bottom – Top

Pearl – Lapis | Top – Bottom (Lapis simply lets Pearl Top)

Pearl – Jasper | Power-Bottom – Top

Pearl – Bismuth | Top – Bottom

Lapis – Jasper | Top – Bottom

Lapis – Bismuth | Bottom – Top

Jasper – Bismuth | Top – Top (Always a Power Struggle)

Peridot Bottom’s everybody…even when they let her pretend to be the top, she’s still the Bottom

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A mid-story chapter of a Crystal Gem Harem AU I wanted to write and will still hopefully write someday.


	8. Superhero AU - Polygems - (SFW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is categorized under: Unfinished.

_“Ah so vee meet again vautair vitch! Only Zish time I vill have Zee last laugh! Hahahaha!”_

_“Says the coward behind the screen, but don’t you worry Doc I’ll be paying you a visit real soon!”_

_…_

_“You think you’re so tuff huh? Well let’s see how tough you are against the best bull’s money can buy! GET’RE BOYS!”_

_“You’re overblown Texan accent is absolutely awful you know that? Fine, if you insist on hiding behind your minions then I’ll just come to you! Get ready the puma’s got your scent!”_

_…_

_“You can’t beat me War Machine. I’ll be taking that flux capacitor.”_

_“You can try, but I do not foresee myself losing to your robots anytime soon.”_

_…_

_“YOu AbSOLutE MonSTER! I WiLL ShEER YoU TO PieCEs RENEGADE!!”_

_“Oh please, you have never stood a chance against me! I am by far one of the most skilled supers in the day and age. I am highly trained in several different form of combat and am a successful- Hey! At least allow me to finish!”_

_…_

_“Oi G’day Sheila, missed me that badly eh? Can’t say I blame ya, but my boys are a might busy at the moment. Why don’t you have go at a few of my dingo’s since yer ‘ere.”_

_“You have to be the worst villain I have the displeasure of facing. I’m gonna find you one of these day Driver, you can’t hide behind that screen forever! But you are right about one thing, I would like to have a go at your ‘dingo’s’…IT’S TIME TO BRING DOWN THE HAMMER!”_

_…_

_…_

_…_

_“Why are you two here!? Madam Vicious is my arch enemy and I will not allow her capture to fall to anyone other than me!”_

_“Chill Birdy me and spritz ain’t here for your baddie. ‘Parently witchy tits traced her weird mad scientist here just like I did with the Dust Devil.”_

_“Witchy tits…really?”_

_“Something is wrong. We all shouldn’t have traced them all to the same place.”_

_“Gar- War Machine, Forge why are…your traced your villains her as well?”_

_“Sure did, finally got a working signal out of the last bunch of robot dogs I had to squash…probably would’ve found this place sooner if I knew how to control my strength better!”_

_“It’s weird that all of our arch villains hide behind their robot legions and hire thugs, I remember a few weeks ago the Mad Doctor mentioned something about robotic animals despite him never utilizing any.”_

_“The answers lie within. Let’s proceed cautiously.”_

_…_

_…_

_“Wha-what are you all doing here!? Wait! Wait! Don’t do anything rash! I’m just the secretary the league isn’t in right now!”_

_“What are you talkin’ ‘bout cutie? And keep those hand where we can see them, no funny business.”_

_“Come on Puma lower the whip you’re terrifying the poor thing. Okay Tiny start from the top, what do you mean the league isn’t here?”_

_“The league of super villains…this is their hideout…how did you all not know about that if you are standing here right now?”_

_“I see, that would explain why their tactics and schemes are so similar… Never mind what we do and do not know! I suggest you tell us your name and why you are working for a crime syndicate, for your sake I hope you have a very good reason for being on this side of the law.”_

_“My name is Peridot and like I said I’m just the secretary! I don’t want to be here, but I have no choice they have my little sister…oh stars behind you! That’s the sound of Mr. Terminations fighter jet, he will kill her and me once he finds you all here!”_

_“Hey don’t worry Peri we won’t let them hurt you or your sister, they picked an awful spot for their little clubs secret base. I’ll just used the ocean too… Hey! What the hell is this weird goo!?”_

_“Nyahahaha you stupid supers! I can’t believe every single one of you turned your back to me and for such an obvious lie! Nyahahaha I do have to give you credit for finding my hideout though, I honestly didn’t think any of you were smart enough to actually track me down!”_

_“So you’re not the secretary for the league.”_

_“Astute observation War Machine, no the villains pulling your strings and running you all in circles has just been me this entire time! Personally I think my different personas were spot on despite what you all said about my choice in accents…but I digress before you all escape while I monologue. Farwell hero’s I hope you enjoy your demise at the bottom of the ocean! Nyahahahahaha.”_

_…_

_…_

_…_

_“It’s not fair! I specifically designed that goo to last at least twice as long as it did!”_

_“Tough nuts there P-dot, we got out and got you and now you’re off to prison! Word of warning though since you’re so cute, don’t drop the soap hahaha!”_

_“Why did you design the trap to fail? You had us all neutralized. Logically there should have been no escape for us, especially since you had blocked the Witch’s Hydrokinesis abilities.”_

_“You actually think I want you all dead? Are you crazy!? The rise in crime would be drastic and I only have so much money to bribe the simple minded! I don’t want to rule over a world of chaos you clods! I need you around to clean up the trash while I mount greater and greater schemes to take over the world!”_

_“So you think you just get to call the shots and we’ll dance to your tune? News flash dork that’s not how we operate…well maybe Renegade would be into that shit but not me, I’m done being anyone’s tool.”_

_“Oh please if you clods ‘danced to my tune’ I wouldn’t have to keep trying so hard to steal things! I’d have you bring me my components directly! I tried that with other less intelligent so called super villains, but they all turned out to be utterly useless so I had to have the competition disposed of, why do you think your ‘golden year’ of fighting crime even happened!? I orchestrated most of your silly little victories!”_

_“Tiny isn’t wrong, ever since her ‘league’ came on the scene we haven’t really had to deal with any big threats or supervillains except for a few upstarts.”_

_“Yeah and she doesn’t hurt any civvies either pretty respectable for a so called villain, she gets puma points for not making me run around getting the stupid ass populous out of the way of shit.”_

_“I can’t rule over people who are dead or resent me! It’s only natural I wouldn’t harm the average person- Why are we even talking about this!? If you are taking me in the get it over with I can’t bear to look at you clods any longer!”_

_“Not overly destructive, has a moral compass, easy to take down due to having only minor metal powers and cute to boot…I say we let it ride what say you War Machine? Got any predictions that say otherwise?”_

_“No. I believe this will benefit the world greatly…and no, I don’t see you ruling over it anytime soon Peridot.”_

_…_

_…_

_…_

_“It’s not fair! I made that robot specifically to counter your water spears! Why didn’t you tell me you could freeze them!?”_

_“Now, now Peridot. You know we can’t let you in on ever little secret that we have, where would the fun be in that? Besides, that was a team fight so even if Lapis hadn’t been able to do that my spear would have been more than enough to put your robot out of commission.”_

_“Yeah Peri we got to keep you on top of your game, don’t want you getting bored.”_

_“That is an awful excuse! Also no teaming up! It makes the robots harder to design and how did you two even get in here!? I have new traps in place and motion sensors and- and- AND DON’T THINK CUDDLING ME WITH DISTRACT ME YOU CLODS!”_

_“Did I come at a bad time?”_

_“Oh hello Garnet, don’t mind Peridot’s screeching she is just a little upset at losing to me a Lapis earlier today.”_

_“HOW!? HOW DO YOU ALL KEEP GETTING PASSED MY SECURITY!?”_

_“I hate to pull you away from your cuddles, but Amethyst needs help on the west coast. Earth Breaker escaped custody again and she is going to need Lapis’ help. Yours wouldn’t be amiss either Pearl.”_

_“Yeah sure, you just don’t want us around for what you and Biz have planned for Peri tonight. Don’t think we didn’t hear all those juicy details earlier over the comm’s.”_

_“WHAT!? WHAT IS BEING PLANNED BEHIND MY BACK!?”_

_“You know that’s not true Lapis, me and Bismuth would love to have you all here as well, but your powers are Earth Breaker’s key weakness and since he has a thing for Pearl…”_

_“Oh please don’t bring that up!”_

_“WILL SOMEONE EXPLAIN!?”_

_“Oh calm down Peri, Garnet and Bismuth are gonna punish you tonight for managing to steal that superconductor last weekend from under their noses. I’d imagine your punishment is going to involve and lot of screaming from you and a very sore ass if Garnet is going to take the lead this time.”_

_“Oh? Are you blushing Peridot? I don’t think Bismuth will mind if I get started first.”_

_“Come Lapis let’s finish this fight quickly, we might very well be able to make it back in time for the main show. A smooch for you and a smooch for you, now let us be off!”_

_“WAIT DON’T LEAVE ME WITH HER! SHE HAS HUNGRY EYES! I HAD PLANS! I WAS GOING TO- OH MY STARS!”_

_“Have fun Peri! Garnet, try to save some for the rest of us!”_

_“I make no promises.”_

_“OH MY STAAAAAAAAAAAARS!”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "What if Peridot was an over the top, clumsy James Bond-esc villain? What if the hero fell for her? What if all the gems were hero's? What if Peridot was ALL of their villains? What if they all fell for her?" Was the late night thoughts that inspired this, would like to come back to this one day, but knowing me I probably never will...


End file.
